Hi All,
I'm probably posting this new thread when i shouldn't, i have just got back from the pub after a few bevvies!
I did a half days guiding for 2 regulars today on the river Teign, mayfly were hatching in abundance but the fish were proving difficult to tempt.
In the back of my mind i was also thinking of my mother, who at 86 had just had a stroke, but i thought no, what is a few minutes extra fishing going to make, how wrong i could have been, when i left my clients i got to the residential care home 1 hour later to visit my mother, to be met by the manager who informed me my mother had passed away 10 minutes earlier, 10 bloody minutes!
But i am positive that knowing her son as she did she would have understood.
God i am going to have a headache tomorrow.
Richard

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Richard Jackson
Fly fishing instruction and guiding in the heart of Devon
www.devonflyfisher.com

Richard, sorry to hear the sad news. Sincere condolences on your loss.

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Eddie
"We look to Scotland for all our ideas of civilisation."
Voltaire

Richard,
I visited my grandmother in her 89th year in hospital, knowing it was very close. I tried to tell her all the things I wanted her to know before she left, and very few words came out, even though I wasn't sure she could hear or understand me.
20 mins later I arrived home to be told she had just died.
Even though I was fortunate enough to have been there and had the chance to tell her what a wonderful grandma she had been, I still feel I could have told her more.
It seemed to me that there is never enough time, and there will always be some sort of regret, but in the perspective of your times together, I bet you did enough a thousand times over.
I think my gran knew.
So if you give yourself a hard time over your choice today, allow the probability that she was proud of you in the big picture, and glad that part of her was passing on new possibilities to the future.

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"Quality will be remembered long after the price is forgotten."
"The pain of equipment failure lasts longer than the thrill of a bargain."
(from The Book of Tackle Acquisition, chapter 6, Universal Laws).

Nicely put courty, Richard I am sorry for your loss, I too had all sorts of regrets when my parents died, should have done this, wish I had said that etc, they haunt you for a while.
But don't feel bad on yourself, inside you know you probably did all you could, it will pass mate, just takes time.
Regards Steven.

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"A glint of sun has warmed the air,The flies will soon hatch out, To lure and tempt from their deep lair, The bonnie speckled trout." SKB tackle supporter. I love Furled Leaders.

Richard,

Is a song by Mike and the Mechanics (Mike Rutherford ex Genisis), which sums your angst up perfectly. Is called "The Living Years" did help me through simillar times.
Dont beat yourself up about timing, am sure she knew you cared, and after all im sure she understood.

my kindest regards

bert

Sorry to hear about your mother Richard. You have my sympathy
Bill

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Handeman

Sorry to hear about your mum. I recently lost my grandad, who was the closest thing to a dad i had. He passed away whilst i was on the plane from NZ to the UK, trying to make it there in time so i feel your pain. It sucks not having got to say goodbye but deep down, i know, like i'm sure your mum knew, that he knew how much i loved him and wanted to be there, just like you did....Don't give yourself a hard time about it, she wouldn't have wanted that.

All the best bro...