It'll catch and that's the main thing.....and it'snot a bad effort
Oh - I'm not trying to pick faults with your pattern...so apologies if it seems that way.
It looks as though you've 2 or 3 layers of tying thread....try using just 1 or 2 max........it will create a thinner fly
As has been said don't go that far round the bend of the hook....stop 2 - 3 mm further back
Is it on a size 12 hook (i think it is)....if so try it on a size 10 the slightly bigger hook makes tying easier until you've perfected the proportions
I catch my thread in at the thorax, then go down the hook and back up....it's then just a case of building up the thorax a little and catching in the wing cases.
You've used goose biots (nothing wrong there and they look nice) ...but also consider medium orange holographic tinsel or medium gold holographic tinsel...... on sunny day's the little bit of flash makes a huge difference.
Saying all that though it'll catch fish, and plenty of them....
best wishes Rob